You constricted my heart and made it intolerant to ‘maybes’ and second guesses

Through your constant drilling and digging,
You hardened my shell.

You’ve made love such a fright to me,
Because with you, it shape-shifted so many times;
Into so many horrible things;
It left me confused.

You healed me,
Then used me;
Almost like you healed me to use me.

Tears don’t trickle,
But scars form.

From the random fun memories of us,
To the guilt that sweeps through my heart.

I’m as conflicted as a war zone,
The war is within me;
As I fight not to hate you.